Be Kind To Yourself!

Welcome back to 2015 fellow Optimistic Disturbers and welcome to the 30+ new disturbers who have joined us over the break.

I did intend to start writing earlier than this, but over the break hackers intruded this site and shut it down. It must be so sad having so little in your life that you receive any form of satisfaction from that!

Anyhow, we are Optimistic Disturbers and we have work to do!

In most workplaces staff are now back and life has returned to how we knew it pre Christmas. But has it really?

What have you decided to do differently this year? What have you decided that you will quit? What have you decided that you will achieve this year?

Unless we ask ourselves these questions and then go about finding answers, life will be a rotating door.

So here is my #1 for 2015 – To be kinder to myself!

 What does that mean? Well it means that I intend to work just as hard as ever and still have measurable goals, but it also means that I need to give myself some time to breathe and smell the roses. I am sure that some of you will understand what I mean!

 To become selfless you must first become selfish!

 This might seem a strange statement to some, but it is your definition of selfish that is important. It does not mean that you don’t give to others and support those around you, but it does mean that to be successful and not constantly overwhelmed, we must create space in our mind and in our lives to work on ourselves.

There are so many people that I know who have done very little with their lives (their words) because all they have done is focused on everyone else.

Deep down many of them love it because it actually stops them from having to focus on themselves and make decisions. But others just get caught up in the wheel of life and end up very disappointed with what they have achieved.

 Great leaders understand that to build followers they must create times when they can withdraw from the pack to reflect and strategise.

 So, as you establish new goals for 2015, why don’t you start with you? Why don’t you indulge yourself and have a moment of selfishness that will better equip you to be selfless?

Then come back into the tribe giving them 100% of your time.

I am so glad that we are intelligent creatures and have been given the ability to control our own lives and destinies. So let’s take advantage of that and make the decisions that are right for everyone – especially ourselves.

Have the most amazing year and please communicate with me. I love hearing about your Optimistic Disturber moments.

Regards

Des Penny – The Optimistic Disturber

8 comments

  1. Dear Des
    I love your post. Your section about focusing on everyone else really struck a chord. I am happy to tell you, though, that I have started taking your advice. This year I am working, writing my 6th book, studying Spanish, going to pilates and last week I went to a cooking class. I think that’s about enough being kind to myself! Life’s too short to not smell the roses.

  2. Happy new year Des and all, your blog is a timely reminder. 12 months ago I made a big move within my current org and it’s been tough. I’d lost a lot of myself taking on this role and getting in to it. Feeling under valued I decided to look for a move to where my experience and skills would be valued and for a business with similar values to my own. Updating my resume’ was a great reflection, highlighting my results/achievements which built my self confidence and energy and of course, led me to the point you make. In 2015 whilst I strive to be the best me I can be and to deliver the best results, I’m going to be kinder to me and saviour what I’ve done and am doing, not just on what is still to do. Thanks Des all the best to you and the team.

  3. Hi Des,
    excellent advice as always. Last year I had to go through the hard lessons that life gives you when you put work and your staff first and yourself second. Not good for anyone!

    This year I am focusing on ‘reasonable expectations’ – for myself, and my staff, and working in some ‘me’ time during the week. A walk outside at lunch, and a long lunch each month for some pampering (aka massage, facial, lunch out) works wonders.

    Keep up the great articles! cheers

  4. It amazes me how quickly we can forget these statements. I took a longer than usual break (4wks instead of 1-2wks) over the Christmas break and decided that I wasn’t going to do any “work” on this break (first time in a very long time). It took me nearly a week to really relax and when I did several things amazed me (which shouldn’t have but did)
    I slept so much (it was only after I was half way into my holiday that I started to really feel relaxed and well rested)
    I realised that although I thought I had that work/home balance, I didn’t really have a “me thing” ….. I spent my days off with the family which is great but I wasn’t doing anything “for me”. I decided that I would correct this this year by having a set day off each week and taking up something for me ….. I do the rosters for my unit so I thought this would be fine.
    However I have now been back to work for a mth and have not only moved by roster to suit others twice, I have spent that “day off” completing a document that I couldn’t complete at work (I needed a consolidated block of uninterupted time which as a Nurse Unit Manager feels inpossible) ….. I read your blog and thought “old habits die hard” … I obviously need to take it back to basics and rethink. Thanks for the reminder

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